Anne Substack 1/24/24

Everything I ate on the way to KL

Hello substack — I am back. I am scared of this platform generally but obsessed with the way Ashvini has been using it (casual, for friends, and funny and sweet) so now I am going to copy her by also writing a casual substack for my friends. One draft directly into the substack word processor and clicking publish immediately. Copying is literally easy and fun! I’m sorry if we have never met and you’re reading this and missing any context. Think of it like how I read Harry Potter fanfiction in middle school without knowing any of the books.

My 6th favorite genre of YouTube video is the airplane food review. The five genres I like more, in order, are:

1. Any video by this girl Amy who is a blonde Australian girl who’s lived in China for 10 years and runs a channel called BlondieInChina. I can’t tell if this is good or bad politically. Likely bad

2. Celebrity AD home tours.

3. The annual UMich Department of Musical Theatre senior performance that happens at the beginning of first semester.

4. The annual CMU Department of Musical Theatre freshman performance that happens at the end of first semester.

5. Black Country, New Road live performance of Concorde in Birkenhead, UK in June 2021.

But this is still a really special one and I’m excited to take part in this grand tradition¹.

I left the house at 9:30 PM on Monday, January 22nd. I arrived in KL at around 12:00 PM on Wednesday, January 24th. Here’s everything I ate on the way :D

Date and Time: 1/22/24 11:02 PM PST

Location: the lounge that my mom’s credit card got us into in SeaTac. Shout out to my mom fr. She is seriously awesome you guys

Vibes: trepidatious. a couple next to us was watching a cop show on speaker full volume on their shared iPad. HOWEVER i was at this moment loving the outfit I selected for traveling which is an amazing feeling, especially if you’ve ever regretted an outfit you selected for traveling. feeling preemptively queasy for the flight because it’s important to stay prepared. My mom and I talk about how we’ve both felt malaise about this trip for a solid month leading up to it.

“Lobster Bisque”. Thick in a way that reminded me of a non newtonian fluid. The Color uncanny as well. 4/10

Action shot of me eating veggies and guac. I’m realizing I don’t know what exactly is the vegetable just under the celery up top. However this was absolutely delicious 8/10

1 and a half Italian meatballs plus mozz and parm and some weird little red bell peppers I decided to add for color. The meatballs were so soft you could mush them up with your tongue. Delivering classic flavors (beef, tomato) in a recognizable form — a solid 6/10

Date and Time: 1/23/24 1:37 AM PST

Location: the plane somewhere over the Pacific

Vibes: barely conscious. The ayi sitting next to me and my mom is chatty so I’m half awake learning about her grandson, who is an only child and the center of the lives of two parents and two sets of grandparents. Apparently every day he does tutoring and homework until 10pm and his ass is only 6 years old!!! Save him!!! She showed us a 30 second video of him boxing and replayed it twice.

Clockwise from top left: Coffee cake 5/10, fruit 8/10, roll 6/10, smoked salmon salad randomly really good honestly?? lately i’ve been Veggie pilled 7/10, chicken with potatoes 7/10 because I loved those damn potatoes

Date and Time: 1/23/24 8:25 AM PST

Location: the plane still somewhere over the Pacific

Vibes: I was unmoored from space and time but feeling at peace with it due to the Ambient album I was listening to which made me feel extremely mature. Ayi next to us still feeling chatty and asking questions like “when will your mom get grandkids” and I don’t know how to say “I’ve let my hot laptop rest on my lower stomach way too much at this point so half my eggs are probably denatured, plus rn I’m focused on trying to invent 5 minutes of stand up comedy that I actually believe in, NOT to mention that I’m in many ways TWELVE” so I say “I don’t have enough money yet hehe” which is also true!

Unbelievably blurry but U Already Know The Vibes. Senbei were absolute killers, the star of today’s journey, when I’m on a plane I crave salt the same way horses do, 10/10

Date and Time: 1/24/24 11:01 AM PST

Location: the plane somewhere between Japan and Taiwan

Vibes: Nonverbal but that is ok

Bell pepper/kelp/noodle salad really good tbh 7/10, CITRUS <3 10/10 loving citrus is what being an asian girl means to me not that it matters or is even tolerable to think, roll [null], congee w pork/preserved vegetable/fish floss 8/10. thank you to this meal.

Date and Time: 1/24/24 5:40 AM Taipei time

Location: The lounge at the Taoyuan Airport. Once again shout out to my mom’s amazing credit card. What a delight

Vibes: Absolutely triumphant at first ngl — 12 hr and 40 min flight down and just a 4-5 hour long flight to go. But then the TV in the airport was playing BBC which for some reason had six commentators talking about the Oscar nominations?? And under it was ticker tape saying that Israel said that 24 soldiers died in Gaza and saying absolutely nothing about Palestinians and then I felt that classic sense of doom because every institution is unspeakably and also explicitly evil lately. Well

My mom and I shared two bowls of noodles: vegetarian tofu and mushroom noodles. Anything hot and wet after a flight takes on healing properties. 9/10 mama!!!!

Niu rou mian — well this girl is an absolute classic for a reason.Beef, noodles, soup, it has it all! Wish it was a little spicier but sometimes not everything needs to be spicy to be fun to eat. Thank you for your service NRM 8/10

And then I didn’t eat anything from when we departed from the Glamorous Textile Art themed gate in Taipei until we landed in KL.

Date and Time: 1/24/24 2:05 PM KL time

Location: My relatives’ apartment complex in KL

Vibes: Unnameable. Lonely? but also psyched to eat the following bowl of noodles

Ipoh hor fun— silky rice noodles in a broth made from shrimp shells. Topped with wontons, shrimp, chicken, and veg. Kind of like the lore around NYC bagels, locals say that the water in Ipoh produces the best version of these noodles. When I’m in Asia I think to myself that I would be willing to give up freedom of speech to eat this every day. 10/10

Now it’s midnight and the malaise hasn’t left. It’s not productive to talk about, though, bc I don’t have the language for it yet. But right now I what I want most is to sit in various apartments with my friends and talk/eat popcorn/watch Get On Your Knees.

If you’re reading this, I miss you!

- Anne

1. Don’t love going to KL, have never loved going to KL for as long as I’ve been sentient, everyone’s family loves them and hurts them, there is nothing new under the sun! I think this all might be a much better topic for a substack than food reviews, but it’s the kind of thing I won’t know how to write about until I’m 30, or even better, the perfect age of 34